So there’s this game I play.
And part of me kinda hates it.
(But in reality, it’s one of my favorite games of all time.)
And it’s got to do with fear.
The Four-Letter “F Word”
Most of the time, fear is the #1 thing that holds us back from living our most fulfilling life.
Not just talking or dreaming about the things we want to do…but listening to our intuition and DOING the dang thing!
Whether it’s big stuff like changing careers, leaving a relationship, or moving across the country…
Or small stuff like saying “Hi” to that person, or asking someone to buy your product, or going to a social event…
Fear is that gremlin of resistance which holds us back.
Sure, there are times where the fear is warranted. But most of the time, it’s not. It’s blown way out of proportion.
Your #1 Barrier
If you have the tendency to hold yourself back because of fear…then fear is the #1 thing holding you back from your growth.
Most of us treat fear like a BIG red light, telling us to stop immediately.
But in reality, that’s the opposite of how we wanna approach it.
Because fear is pointing us in the direction of our growth.
Fear is the green light, saying “Go! Go! Go!”.
Which brings us to my game…
The Fear Game
I first learned this from my Optimize teammate and soul-brother, Michael Balchan. (Though he might’ve gotten it from someone else.)
The game is simple. There’s just one rule.
“IF I wanna do something, but fear doing it…THEN I have to do it.”
It’s like an algorithm.
Feel fear? Green light! Go do the thing.
Because we don’t learn much by sitting in our comfort zones all day long.
It’s like we have two options:
- Do the thing that keeps us in our comfort zones
- Do the thing that stretches us into new growth and learning
Moral of the story: Do the one that scares you. Because that’s where the growth comes in.
So…you might be able to see why I have a love/hate relationship with this game.
I hate it for a split second…because it means I’m jumping into discomfort.
But immediately after the fact, I love it. Because I’ve proven to myself that I’m the type of person who takes action towards the things that I want, even in the face of fear.
And THAT is the type of person I want to be.
The Regret-Free Life
There’s this woman Bronnie Ware, who was a palliative care nurse for many years.
Through this, she learned that the #1 regret of people who are dying is:
“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
Powerful stuff, yeah?
And you see that word “courage” in there?
That’s what we’re practicing every time we act on something we fear.
So if you want to live a life that’s free of regrets, it starts by practicing courage.
Put it Into Practice
This week, the challenge is simple: try playing the Fear Game.
If you feel fear…
- Smile and welcome the green light.
- Rub your hands together and say “bring it on!”
- Take the path of courageous action
- No matter the result, celebrate yourself for acting in face of fear. And for taking another step down the path of life that’s true to yourself.
You won’t regret it.
P.S. If you wanna go all-in on conquering fear and building courage, check out Conquering Fear 101 and Antifragility 101 on Optimize. You can check out the full master classes and get access to TONS of other wisdom with a free 14-day trial.